


I owe you

by carolineux



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-09
Updated: 2017-06-20
Packaged: 2018-07-22 15:07:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7443787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carolineux/pseuds/carolineux
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A character study of Remus Lupin. Wolfstar to come.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

 

Early 1960’s  
London

John Lupin liked his job; he really did, most of the time. But recently, he and his co-worker had to take a load a new employee. Jus his appearance rebuffed Lupin. The man always looked like he hadn’t showered for weeks, and his facial hair did not help. Perhaps, this repugnance could be explained by the fact that Lupin wasn’t used to it. Indeed, everything in his life was bright and beautiful, his wife and his marvellous son. Just thinking about them made the man smile. He has never been happier since the birth of his son. Everything was doing well in his life so he said himself that he could at least, bear the small annoyances of life that were nothing after all comparing to the joy he was experiencing every day to be alive.  
“Where is he, isn’t a single day when he’s not late?”, his co worker snapped, pulling on his cigarette.  
“I think I see him coming, look isn’t him over there?” Lupin replied, pointing to the most hideous silhouette thereabouts.  
“Yes, you’re right Lupin, I could have guessed just by the smell.”  
The new employee seemed embarrassed and felt the need to apologize before saying again as he did plenty times before, that he would do his best and that he absolutely needed this job. As much as both men despised him without even know him, they couldn’t ignore the sincerity that overflowed those words. That could have softened the disgust that lies in Lupin but it didn’t. 

After a job of work with the new employee, the three men decided, to go out to dinner in a restaurant. The day has been long and difficult. Not only the man hadn’t the look for the job, but he was also bad at it. By pity, Lupin decided to take him with them for dinner, in hope it would at least cheer up the man a little. The man accepted with enthusiasm, thinking that if hadn’t improved at all at work today, he maybe had made friends. A while after, other people, both friends of Lupin and his co worker joined them. The atmosphere was cheerful, with the alcohol; Lupin was more talkative than ever. Suddenly the conversation took an unexpected turn, when one talked about an article that he read in the newspaper, reporting a new assault by a werewolf.  
“I can’t believe something like that can happen…” the reader announced having finished telling the macabre new. Totally unaware that he had stopped the ambiance. He then turned to Lupin.  
“What our most brilliant colleague think about that, hum?” he asked.  
Lupin, having the confidence that only alcohol can bring, rose from the table and made a statement that was meant solemn.  
“You ask for opinion, dear friend, and I will give it to you”, he started before taking another sip of wine, “Those beasts shouldn’t be alive, they are not humans, and if it was in my power, I would eradicate them one by one until the last”. He emphasized each of his words, planting his fork into the table, unaware of the other clients staring at him. But all his friends around the table, were applauding him chanting, “Lupin our saviour, Lupin our saviour.”  
“You know, friends, I even wonder how the Earth supports such creatures trample its land.” Declared Lupin, satisfied with his little speech. He looked around the table, noticing that their disgusting new co worker wasn’t there. Probably in the restroom, he thought before one of his friends and fresh supporter refilled his glass once again.


	2. Chapter 2

Lupin didn’t know how much time they spent in the restaurant, but before he knew it, he was before the server to pay his share of the meal. He opened his wallet, when he noticed the recurrence of their new co worker that he had almost forgotten. He was standing next to him, eyes fixed on his wallet as if something had caught his interest.  
“Your son?”, he simply asked.  
“Yes it’s him”, Lupin also simply replied, unable to prevent a smile forming on his lips as he also stared at the photography.  
“Nice.”  
“Yes, he is, even more in real.” Lupin added proudly. Happy each time someone complimented his son.  
“How old is he?” The man asked, seeming very curious about Lupin’s son, something that didn’t bother Lupin the least at this moment.  
“Four years old, five soon” He replied with another smile.

The whole table headed for the exit of the restaurant when one of them, the same that talked about the article, spoke.  
“I we all should take taxis, I think nobody here can deny we wouldn’t be able to drive.”  
As expected everybody agreed, and called taxis. The first taxi arriving was Lupin’s.  
Almost nobody really paid attention to him as he gave his address to the driver. 

The day after was, fortunately for Lupin, a Saturday. After a drunken sleep, he woke up by a scream. A child’s scream. He headed to the kitchen, cursing internally his son to scream so early in the morning when he saw his wife sitting at the table, trying to comfort their son.   
“What’s going on?” he asked to his wife.  
“Ah, Lyall, you’re awake, well, our son has just lost his security blanket…” she replied.  
Looking at the sad face of his son, Lyall couldn’t be upset anymore about his abrupt awakening. He took him in his arms and started to speak gently.  
“You know Remus, I have the feeling that Teddy will be by your side again very soon.”  
The child just looked at his father waiting for an explanation when he saw him took his wand out of nowhere.  
“Accio!”  
A moment after, the plush flied in the air through the house, before falling into the arms of Remus where it belongs. Observing all the sadness leaving the little face of her son, Hope smiled at him before doing the same to her husband.  
“I don’t cease to be amazed by this.” She declared truly.  
Lyall chuckled happily before replying.  
“It’s nothing; I assure you he will be able to do so much better.” Lupin replied, his eyes not leaving his son. 

The next Monday, after an exhausting day of work, Lupin was sitting at the kitchen’s table eating with his wife as he was complaining about his new co work. It began to be a habit. His wife who also had an exhausting day of work, had prepared dinner and was now listening closely to her husband.  
“I know you told me already, but what’s his name?”  
“Who?” Lupin replied as he had forgotten he had a name.  
“Your new co worker.” Hope patiently said.  
Lupin decided to end the conversation there.  
“Not important.”

“Mr. Greyback, it’s the third time you didn’t pay your rent, if we don’t receive anything soon, we will have to take the necessary measures…” Greyback cut his phone off, not wanting to hear the rest of it. He looked around himself; the kindergarten was full of life, something he felt very far away from at the moment. As he scanned his surroundings, he finally found what he was looking for, a blond head next to the toboggan. He spent the last week to observe the child and his family, in every moment, a happy family was made of. He had watched them through the window if his car and found that spying someone was far too easy. The blond little boy was playing in a quiet way as usual. Greyback wondered if he would be that quiet when the moment will come, he sincerely doubted it. The other children of the park weren’t that quiet. Suddenly one of them shove the boy on the ground who immediately screamed at the strength of the impact. Greyback wondered if he would scream that way or his vocal chords would produce a new kind of sound especially for the occasion. Approaching him wouldn’t be difficult, his babysitter wasn’t very careful. He walked closer to the boy; who has visibly in pain and caught his stare. He was watching him as he was asking him for help. After all, it was logical; he was the only adult in the area. But it had been a while for Greyback that someone had watched directly, usually people would avoid watching him in the eyes when they could. He was used to provoke fear, but there wasn’t a hint of it in those brown eyes. He saw blood oozing from the boy’s leg and surprised himself as he crouched down next to the boy and heard himself saying words that never came from his mouth before.  
“It’s okay, it’s nothing, and it’s just a superficial cut.” He wanted to add that he knew a lot about all kind of injuries but realized that the little person next to him probably didn’t even know the meaning of the word “superficial”. “You’re going to be fine.” His words didn’t seem to have any effect, the boy didn’t calm down and Greyback felt helpless. He didn’t like this feeling and decided to copy something he saw the boy’s mother doing: he put his lips on the boy’s knee. He felt the boy’s starting to relax when someone he didn’t see coming brutally took him by the arm and put him away from the boy.   
“What do you think you’re doing, stay from him!” Someone yelled. Greyback raised his hands and started waling away. Many people were now around the boy, including the babysitter who was watching him leaving. The boy was also watching him, the expression of his eyes unchanged despite the panic movement around him.   
Greyback wondered why people tend to always push away those who only want to help. It was as if they knew that it wasn’t his first intention. He wouldn’t do anything. It’s with this thought in mind that he left the park; he licked his lips and could taste the familiar metallic taste, the result of his awkward kiss.

Greyback was sure he would never see the boy again. It explained his surprise when he saw him in the corridor of his work building, sitting quietly in the waiting room. He walked towards the coffee machine and tried to ignore the feeling caused by the boy’s presence. Then he bought a chocolate bar in dispenser. As he will explain later to the boy, he usually had always some on him but had been distracted enough to forget that day. When he turned around, he noticed that the boy had moved towards the dispenser. Like before he noticed no scent of fear coming from the little person next to him.   
“How’s your leg?” He asked in a nonchalant way. The boy gave no reply and remained still in front of the dispenser observing all the treats.   
“Fine.” Greyback said before buying another chocolate bar and gave it to the boy that immediately opened it and started eating. After this generous action, Greyback took place in a seat of the waiting room, starting eating not expecting the boy to come sitting in the seat next to him.   
“Thank you.” The boy finally spoke, his eyes on the chocolate bar in his hands.  
“You’re welcome. I use to eat a lot of chocolate, you always feel better afterwards. It must come from a chemical substance in it or something, whatever.” Greyback wondered why he felt the need to explain himself to this boy.  
“Anyway, what are you doing here?”   
“My mum came to see my dad and told me to wait here.”  
“How long have you been waiting here?” Greyback asked observing him again, noticing no sign of stress or disgust, it was refreshing.  
The boy just shrugged.  
“Okay, what do you think about waiting in a funnier way.” He took gobstones from his malette and he started to show them one by one to the child who smiled at the animation. They started playing once they finished the bars and Greyback noticed that Remus always picked the blue gobstones when he could.  
“You like blue don’t you?’ He asked also referencing to the boy’s clothes.  
“It’s my favourite colour, what’s yours?”  
“I don’t have one.” The man honestly replied as his eyes caught a woman coming in the room.  
“Remus, we’re leaving.” She exclaimed before looking briefly to Greyback and taking her son’s hand. Remus while following his mother turned his head and looked at him like he did the first time. Now that he knew the name, Greyback thought that nobody mastered irony better than life.

One of the colleagues of Lupin brought the idea of inviting all the employees to a dinner party. Everybody agreed to go.   
The day of the dinner came and Lupin was about to leave his office when he realized he forgot a file in Greyback’s.  
He knocked the door and was glad his co worker was still there.  
“The file is on the desk” Greyback said while typing on his computer.  
“Thanks, I will see you tonight I guess.” Lupin added but realized at the lack of expression from Greyback that he wasn’t aware of the dinner. Unwillingly, he invited him.  
“You should come, everybody will be glad to see you there.” Lupin concluded with a forced smile before leaving the office. As he found himself alone again, Greyback wondered why Lupin had invited him since it was obvious he didn’t want to. The way he looked at him made him feel like he was an insect. Social events weren’t his thing, but the insect decided to come with the hope to see Remus.

The dinner party went well. The food was good as well as the conversations. Lupin heard some of his colleagues, mostly women commenting the change of appearance of Greyback. He couldn’t deny that the man took care of himself lately; he didn’t know what caused this change. As the dinner ended, some went to take a smoke accompanied by those who wanted to visit the garden where the children were. Greyback walked towards them under the moon’s light, and saw Remus looking at it.   
“Hey Remus, are you okay?” He asked before handing him chocolate.  
Remus nodded and looked surprised at the gift but didn’t hesitate to take it although he didn’t open it.   
“I told you I had always some on me.”   
Remus suddenly touched his arm and then looked at him playfully.  
“You have to catch me now.” Greyback understood the children were probably in some kind of game and instantly started to run after Remus. He had imagined himself running after him but absolutely not like that. Remus shouldn’t be laughing while running him either. He ended up catching him and both fell on the ground.  
“I think you lose.” Greyback stated with a smile. Remus didn’t seem bothered by it and was still smiling but the fact that startled Greyback the most was that he didn’t make a move to free himself from him and remained under him on the ground.   
“Remus!” Greyback heard the voice at the same moment he saw Lyall who was looking for his son standing in front of them.  
“Come here, we’re leaving, it’s getting late.” Remus got up regretfully for Greyback and followed his father quietly after whispering goodbye. Something his father didn’t do and the look he gave to Greyback made him feel bad this time. As he was still sitting on the ground, he wondered if he really did something bad.

On their way back, Hope Lupin noticed how tensed her husband was. Once in their house, she profited that their son was in his bedroom to ask him what was wrong.  
“I saw Greyback playing with Remus; I don’t like that at all.”   
“Oh honey, I think you stress yourself for nothing, despite everything you told me about him, this man seemed nice really, he behaved well during the dinner.” Lyall frowned at her reply but let her continue. “I must admit that I didn’t recognize him at first, it seems he made some change about his appearance.” Lyall immediately winced at that.  
“What, what do you mean, tonight wasn’t the first time you saw him?”  
“No, I already saw him, at the Ministry, when I went to see you last time; he was in the waiting room playing with Remus.”  
“So it’s not the first time he’s been in contact with Remus.”  
“Indeed but you have nothing to worry about, please calm down, you’re going to wake him up” Hope said trying to reason his husband.  
“You don’t understand, I feel something around him, like an aura, something sinister.” Lyall tried to explain, he felt like his son talked to the devil.  
“An aura?” Hope asked incredulous. “Those things do not exist Lyall.”  
“Trust me; those things do exist, in your world as much as in mine.” Her husband seriously replied.


	3. the bite

The Lupins didn’t wake Remus up, simply because he wasn’t asleep yet. He had trouble finding sleep that night, something unusual for him and his parent’s dispute wasn’t helping in any way. He knew it had something to do with the stranger he played with earlier. He ended up finding sleep after eating the chocolate he had kept in his pocket.

The feeling to have done something bad didn’t leave Fenrir Greyback but the desire to see Remus again proved to be stronger. He went to the park where he first saw him, immediately spotted him and his babysitter. He sat on the bench next to them and just observed. He naively thought it would be enough to just be able to watch him at a short distance but he was wrong, he wanted to come closer. Surprisingly it was the babysitter who approached him first.  
“Hi, I had trouble recognizing you but I wanted to say thanks for last time.” She spoke to him, seeming sincere in her words. No doubt she felt guilty about her negligence. After accepting her thanks, Greyback thought she would leave but she tried to start a conversation. They were all the same, some were attracted to him, but always ended up discovering the truth and give up on him. Fenrir knew the story by heart and didn’t feel the need to retry the experience. His focus was entirely on Remus. He somehow succeeded to get out of the conversation to join Remus. He was more talkative now with him and he appreciated that, probably more than he should. They spent the late afternoon playing and neither of them saw the time passing. When he returned home that day, the bad feeling had been replaced by welfare for Greyback, he honestly felt good, like he didn’t in a long time. Suddenly he didn’t care at all if what he was doing was good or bad.  
The next day he did the same thing and once again he enjoyed spending his time this way. From that moment, he came to the park almost each day. He was being nice and replied enough to the babysitter to be allowed to spend time with Remus, his only interest. Since the weather at this time of the year melted chocolate, he took the habit to buy ice cream to Remus who gladly accepted each time, but didn’t compromise about the flavor. Those moments were the only moments of light in his days and helped him to stand his days of work. He was glad to have found something that finally made him feel good, he obscured the thought that wanting to spend time with a child so much wasn’t very healthy. For now he was glad to have that, even trough he had the feeling that this thing was about to slip from his fingers from one moment to the other. 

“There are some rumors.” Lyall declared at his wife after their son was in bed.  
“Hum?” Hope replied leaving her eyes from her book.  
“At work about Greyback.” Her husband explained himself.  
“And what you dear colleagues are saying about him?”  
“That he’s a werewolf.” Lupin announced.  
“Lyall, you’re so obsessed that you see them everywhere.”

When Fenrir woke up that day, his bones were aching but he wasn’t surprised, it was the same after each full moon. It’s a common thought that people can get accustomed to everything. Greyback knew it wasn’t the case. While getting dressed, he wondered if it was a good idea to go to the park but decided to still go. The pain changed his way of walking and somehow came to the park. A lot of people were there but not the person he wanted to see. The intelligence of the young wizard impressed him; he knew he didn’t say anything to his parents about their meetings. If he had, he wouldn’t be there walking into his direction right now. He sat up next to him on the bench and looked at him closely.  
“Are you hurt?” The child asked without unceremonious. Only a child could do that.  
“You can say that yeah.”  
Remus showed his leg then and added.  
“I know how it hurts.”  
Fenrir got a closer look to the wound.  
“You healed fast and good.” He offered with a smile.  
“I will get a scar, like yours.” He replied referencing to the scars on the adult’s face.  
“It’s possible.” Fenrir agreed, thinking once again that this boy didn’t deserve to start a scars collection similar to his.  
Then Remus took his hand for the first time while they walked in the park. Not used to human contact anymore, even the simplest ones, Greyback gladly accepted it, letting go a sigh that he wasn’t aware to hold, he will realize later that he held his hand in a too strong manner but Remus never complained about it.  
The next time they saw each other, it was Remus’s turn to be hurt but not physically. Fenrir saw it immediately because Remus didn’t come to him right away. He tried to start the conversation as usual but the boy had a sinister look. Children were playing in front of them and Fenrir thought it could be a good distraction.  
“Why don’t you play with them, hum?” Greyback asked, trying to cheer him up. As the boy tensed up, he guessed it was the source of the problem.  
“They don’t want me to.” Remus simply said darkly.  
“Really? And why is that?” Fenrir asked surprised and curious.  
“They say I’m weird, not normal.” The boy replied, begging him with his eyes to say otherwise.  
“Remus, you’re great, you will be a fantastic wizard trust me.” Fenrir reassured him while smiling, and realized that he really meant it. It seems Remus felt it because he instantly looked better.  
“It’s what my dad is always saying to me.” He declared proudly.  
Fenrir couldn’t agree more.  
“And he’s right. Your dad is a great wizard and man.” He added swallowing his resentment.  
“Yes He’s the best wizard in the world.” Remus did outbid.  
“Yes he is.” Fenrir lied again but if each lie of his could produce such a beautiful smile on Remus’s face, he was willing to lie every day for the rest of his life.

Fenrir knew about the rumors circulating. He had lost all of his previous jobs, but he had a good feeling about this one. Everything was going well, and he didn’t see why it couldn’t go on this way. Perhaps, his positive mood was induced by his time with Remus. That’s why he didn’t really worry when an unexpected colleague passed the door of his office. Everything he knew about Cronshaw was that he was close to Lupin and came only for bad news, but still even that didn’t give him the alarm bells. Cronshaw walked through the office like it was his and suddenly explained the reason for his coming.  
“I guess you know the reason behind my venue, so better coming to the point.” The man inspected the objects on the desktop before declaring simply. “You’re fired.” Greyback tried to no let show his shock. “I’m sure you heard about the rumors about you; well just let’s say it was predictable.” Then Cronshaw lighted a cigarette and gave a little more explication. “I guess it could have stayed like that a while but someone went to the management bringing up all the rumors and showed how plausible they are, what I’m sure you will be smart enough to not deny.” He was right, Greyback wouldn’t deny, he knew how useless it was. But one question didn’t leave his mind.  
“Who?”  
“I’m not sure if I’m allowed to reveal this particular information, I am sorry.” Cronshaw answered, preparing to leave. As he passed the door, Greyback raised his voice.  
« It’s Lupin, isn’t it? » The other man felt how much the werewolf wanted it to be Lupin, so he gave him the answer he wanted, through he wasn’t even sure it was him.  
“Yes, Lupin.” He nodded, before closing the door.  
Greyback couldn’t believe it; he started to pack his things, wanting to get out of there as fast as possible. He went out into the corridor, with cartons in his arms when a familiar silhouette appeared a few steps from him. He didn’t want Remus to witness that. Observing the cartons, Remus opened his mouth.  
“You’re leaving?”  
“No, I’m just moving a few things.” He lied. « Are you fine? » He inquired.  
Remus nodded before looking around himself, seeming lost.  
“Looking for your dad’s office right, it’s a little tricky to find, I will show you the way, come.” Remus didn’t hesitate one second and followed him immediately, taking his hand at the same time. Greyback let him at some meters from Lupin’s office so he won’t see him with his son but he got unlucky because the door opened at this same moment. The expression of Lupin changed instantly as he saw their hands. The expected reaction came.  
“Don’t touch my son, Remus come here now.” Looking ashamed, his son obeyed. “What did I tell you about strangers, do you even listen to me?” Remus apologized. Feeling his distress, Greyback who were about to leave, intervened.  
“Don’t reprimand him, he did nothing wrong.”  
“That’s right, you’re the one to blame, but it’s over now, your place isn’t here anyway, it had never been.” Lupin said, looking satisfied.  
Greyback forced himself to not respond and turned to leave.  
« I wish you good luck for the future even if we all know where should remain your kind…”  
Again, Greyback didn’t reply and swallowed down his anger, maybe he had if Remus wasn’t there, he didn’t want to make a scene in front of him.

That evening, Greyback went to a bar he had avoided for a long time now. It was a werewolves landmark. Fenrir ceased to go there when he decided to try to integrate the wizard world, knowing they wouldn’t approve it. As soon as he got there, one of them approached him and offered him a drink.  
“Fenrir, a long time we didn’t see you there, what have you been up to?” He asked even if he knew very well the answer.  
“You know what I was doing, you were right all along.” The other werewolf smiled in a satisfied way before replying. “Seeing it yourself is always better and often the only way to really realize it.” The man explained.  
“I didn’t know there were people who wanted so much our death, I met one. It’s him who lead me straight here.” Greyback said bitterly drinking his glass.  
“Oh and what are you going to do about that?” The older werewolf asked. Greyback knew the answer but didn’t want to say it yet. The man decided to go on. “Every action induces a reaction; don’t tell me he didn’t seek it by acting the way he does.”  
“I didn’t say that.”  
“Don’t either tell me you didn’t think about what would make him suffer the most.” This man was so damn right. Those words brought the image of Remus’s face in Greyback’s mind.  
“No, it would be cruel.”  
“We all are cruel, humans are cruel, and our kind even more if you listen to them, maybe it’s time for you to accept your true nature.” The other said looking him in the eyes. Greyback didn’t stand it and went to the bathroom, dropping his glass at the same time. He looked at the mirror but didn’t see himself. He saw the wolf instead and it was hungry.

“Greyback has been fired today.” Lyall announced to his wife, before going to sleep.  
“I hope you’re happy with yourself.” She replied turning off the light.

The day before the full moon finally came and Greyback couldn’t wait anymore but wanted to see Remus one more time before the inevitable. He couldn’t help thinking that doing what he planned would deprive him of those daily moments so pleasant his mind and that maybe it didn’t worth it. He couldn’t bear the thought of losing this. If he was able to see the child like before, he wouldn’t have to do it and could stand everything. He was naïve enough to actually believe it being a possibility. Remus was at the park that day, sitting on their usual bench but didn’t go to him. Fenrir knew he had seen him but avoided his gaze. It pained him. He decided to buy an ice-cream and handed it to him. The child still didn’t look at him and didn’t take the gift either.  
“Please, Remus, don’t speak to me if you don’t want to but accept this.”  
Remus looked unsure, hesitated but finally took it. As he still didn’t open his mouth, Greyback started to leave and turned around to observe the child who still hadn’t touched the ice cream. He mouthed the words “please, eat” at him before leaving. Remus ate it as fast as he could. He complained about stomach aches later before going to bed. 

At dusk, Greyback made his way to the house thinking that when all of that would be over, he could welcomed Remus to his home, after all who knew better what he will have to go through. He passed through the window of his bedroom, climbing was effortless for him. Remus was asleep, Greyback couldn’t help to observe him, and he looked peaceful and angelic with his sandy blond hair spreading on the pillow. The werewolf put something on the nightstand before getting on the bed. Remus woke up and his mouth opened to scream before Fenrir put his hand on it, stopping him before any sound could come out.  
“Please don’t scream, not yet.” Fenrir whispered to his ear and put his arms around him and intertwined their legs. He could smell the fear filling the room, it radiated from Remus. The child started to sob quietly and tried to get away from the grip without any success. Unlike him, Fenrir clearly enjoyed the embrace but not the distress caused by it.  
“Calm down, it won’t be that bad trust me, I… you will think you’re going to die but it won’t be the case, I promise, just let it happen.” Fenrir whispered. He could see in the brown’s eyes the fight in the child’s brain, trying to determine if he should trust those words. The werewolf finally buried his face in his neck, waiting for the moon to do its work. As he felt the tingling features of the transformation, his breath became erratic and the Remus’s stress increased. He forced himself to relax the best he could when he felt the body surrounding him changing. He realized he wasn’t in the arms of a man anymore but in a wolf’s grip. He stayed still, and thought that maybe the animal wouldn’t hurt him if he didn’t move. He could still feel the ragged breath on his neck, the only thing that didn’t change throughout the transformation. Suddenly the beast turned him and he found himself lying on his stomach. He realized the wolf smelled him taking his time. He couldn’t help a groan when he felt the wolf’s tongue on his neck; he was licking him before opening his mouth and sank his fangs. At that moment Remus finally brought out the scream that he had retained since the entrance of the werewolf in his bedroom. None hand could stop him anymore. He realized how wrong he had been to think nothing could hurt more than his fall in the park months ago; it was nothing comparing to this. His screams tangled to his sobs when the wolf started to bite again at the same place of his body, ready for the second round. The wolf was working his way through his flesh, always deeper than before. At that moment, Remus thought he was going to die when the door of his bedroom opened suddenly, his father was there. Lyall immediately pulled out his wand and sent away the wolf with several spells that made him fall through the opened window. New arms wrapped around Remus to carry him. The last thing his gaze captured from the room was an object on his nightstand that wasn’t there before this night: a blue gobstone.


	4. Chapter 4

The wolf only realized how much he was hungry and for how long when the taste of human flesh filled his palate. It was the first full moon which had fully satisfied his needs. Every full moon should be that way. 

 

“Hope! Take Remus, I start the car.” Lyall screamed running through the house. Hope took her son in her arms. She couldn’t contain her shock.  
“Oh my god, Lyall, he’s bleeding.”  
“I know. Hurry up.” She got into the car while her husband started the engine. Hope started executing some healing spells but her child didn’t stop sobbing when Lyall tried to reassure him.   
“It’s going to be okay Remus, calm down.” Those last words just made him sobbing over again. His father looked at him powerless and guilty.   
“It hurts.” He articulated between sobs unable to stop.  
“I know.” Lyall replied once again.

Once at St Mungo’s, Remus was picked up very fast. His parents were in the waiting room, looking afflicted like they were. It was Hope who broke the silence between them.  
“What happened? You can tell me now, what did you see?” She asked with a quavering voice.  
“I think you know only one thing can inflict that kind of wound.”  
His wife nodded then buried the head in her arms. A few moments later, she raised her head to add something.  
“How ironic it is, you spent your whole life to curse them and that’s what happen now. I can’t help thinking that fixing all your attention on something can only allow it to happen in reality.” She said trying to make sense of what was happening to them.  
Feeling his guilt resurface, Lyall forced himself to reply calmly. He was also angry at his wife to have that kind of defeatist talk which was not help at all in their situation.They didn’t need to have those kind of thoughts right now, none of them. It was simply painful and even if true useless.  
“The only thing that matters now is Remus. He’s going to need us more than ever.”  
As he finished his sentence, a member of the hospital went to them, informing that they could visit their son now that he was out of danger.   
“He’ll live.” The doctor said with a poor smile, that statement was generally a good new. “He doesn’t stop asking for you, both of you.” He added before showing them the way to the room.  
The sight made them flinch but they strived to not show it in front of their son. His neck’s wound had been cleaned and bandaged. No trace of blood was on his body anymore like nothing happened and he had an IV in him.   
“We put it to give him some strength; he was in a state of shock. Apart from that, he didn’t lose that much of blood, his recovery should be fast.” He explained before letting them their privacy.   
“Dad, I’m sorry, I…” Remus spoke first, starting to sob again. His father immediately went to his side.   
“You have nothing to apologize for.” He reassured him before taking him in his arms, letting him cry freely. His mother went to the other side of the bed, caressing his hair.  
“Nobody is angry at you, you did nothing wrong. Are you still in so much pain?” She asked sadly.  
“It’s better.” Her son replied even if anyone could tell he was still in pain. She nodded and kissed his cheek, wanting to cry.   
“It’s going to be okay, you will return home soon.” His father said with a smile to his son that didn’t seem so different when he was in reality.

Greyback woke up on the grass not long after the moon disappeared from the sky. His naked body was very sore like each time but he felt way better. As he regained conscience, he recalled why. It was done; he finally did it after having hesitated for so long. But surprisingly as much as he felt better physically, he couldn’t say the same about his mind. He didn’t remember anything of the previous night, about the way he finally done it. He couldn’t gauge Remus’s pain. He had to make sure he was okay, that he survived him. There were still some traces of his blood in his mouth; he could taste it for the second and last time. 

Remus had to stay to the hospital for one week. His parents stayed with him most of the time when they weren’t at work. He implored his parents to stay especially the night; he had nightmares each night. Hope had tried to make him more comfortable by bringing him some of his belongings from their home.   
“So Frodo didn’t really want to have the ring?” He asked to his mother as she read to him like each night, something that didn’t change.   
“No not really.” She replied and kissed his forehead before leaving to take something to drink.  
“Don’t leave me, please.” He implored as he saw her leaving.  
“I’ll be right back.” She reassured her son with a wink.  
Her husband was at the door, he had isolated himself for a moment. When she was sure the door was well closed, she allowed herself to speak.  
“It’s harder than I thought, he’s so…” She couldn’t finish her sentence.  
Her husband just nodded and they started to make their way to the cafeteria walking side by side. They crossed the path of two doctors not very cautious about who could overhear their conversation.  
“A new patient had arrived, a werewolf attack, not pretty to see.” One of them said to his colleague in the typical calm way of this kind of profession.  
“Yes, very young, usually they don’t survive to that at this age, parents arrived just in time.”  
“After what he will have to go through, he should have died really.” The doctor replied throwing away his empty cup of coffee in the dustbin next to them.   
Hope had watched all the conversation and couldn’t believe her own ears.  
“Did you hear that?” Her husband closed his eyes before replying.  
“I wish I hadn’t.”

One day, some strangers came to Remus’s hospital room. They were from the DMLE. Their presence made Remus feel uncomfortable, he didn’t know what they wanted and thought he did something wrong.  
“Hi Remus, we have to know what exactly happened that night, do you feel strong enough to tell us everything now, as well as you remember?” One man asked while the other tried to make a reassuring smile.  
Remus closed his eyes and forced himself to remember every detail. But when he reached the end of his story, sobs made his words incomprehensible. The policemen decided to stop at this moment and called the parents who went to the police station. They didn’t even start to ask questions when the father spoke.  
“Any investigation is not needed, I know who it is.” He said in a determined voice.  
His wife and the policemen looked at him in surprise and waved him to say the name.  
“Fenrir Greyback. » The wife instantly looked exasperated.  
“God, Lyall, don’t start…”  
“I recognized his stare, I’m sure to be right.”   
“You recognized him in his wolf form?” One policeman asked incredulously.  
“Absolutely after all both are the same person…” The man replied before closing his eyes thinking it was also the case for his son now.  
“Right, well only one person can confirm it.”   
“I have a photo, let’s go.” The father declared surprising his wife when he took it out of his pocket.

At the entrance of the room, both policemen exchanged a glance before one opened his mouth.  
“It would be better if you both stay outside.”  
“Fine.” Lyall reluctantly said while his wife only nodded.   
They expected to find him awake but the boy was sleeping soundlessly.  
“That’s why I don’t want children; see all the pain it can bring.”  
“That boy didn’t ask for anything, you are being unfair.” The other calmly replied with sadness.  
“Yes and that is exactly what makes it worse, come on, wake him up, you’re better than me at this.” Preferring to remain silent, the other complied. He gently patted the boy’s shoulder that instantly woke up; his slumber wasn’t probably very deep. His eyes opened with fear.  
“Hey Remus, it’s us the policemen that came to see you earlier, do you remember?” The boy nodded.  
The other policeman didn’t waste any time, wanted to be over with it as fast as possible.  
“We have another question, we are going to show you a photo and you have to tell us if it was that man who attacked you, okay?” He explained fast.  
“It’s the last time you have to reply to any questions, after that it will all be over okay, can you do that? Do you remember his face?” The other policeman asked still patting the shoulder’s boy who just nodded again.  
“Fine let’s go.” The photo was showed and the reaction didn’t delay to come. The boy started to scream, and sob at the same time uncontrollably.   
“Okay we have our answer, let’s get out of here.” One of them said before standing up, in the hurry to leave while the other tried to calm the boy.  
“Hey Remus it’s okay calm down, he won’t hurt you anymore you are safe.” He raised his voice, trying to soothe him.   
“You won’t be able to calm him, it’s not like someone or something could…”  
Seeing his attempts unsuccessful the other listened to him and resigned himself to also leave the room.


	5. Chapter 5

Leaving the room, the two policemen came face to face to the parents who were waiting for the confirmation.  
“It is indeed him.” One announced.  
“I told you so.” The father replied, angerness present in his voice.  
Before their silence, he spoke again.  
“So how will you process?” He simply asked.  
“What do you mean?” One policeman replied, honestly surprised.  
Rolling eyes, Lyall explained himself.  
“How and when are you going to arrest him?” The man asked again impatiently.  
The two policemen exchanged an embarrassed look before one of them decided to open his mouth.  
“We will do everything in our power to find him.” One said, like a line he recited too often.  
“Somehow I don’t believe you…” Then the other policeman came closer to the angry man.  
“Listen, cases like that always end up the same way, an inquiry is opened, and we look for the man for a while before giving up because you see that kind of person have a certain ability to disappear.”   
“I can’t believe it, how dare you? You are supposed to protect people… and you don’t even have the guts to do your damn job!”  
“You don’t do yours either…” The policeman answered stoically.  
“What?” The father replied, not understanding.  
“Your son is still screaming.”  
This sentence alone enough to put an end to the conversation and both parents came into the room.

 

“Hello Remus. It’s time to change your bandage.” The doctor checked on Remus every day since his arrival. Physically he was doing better but he couldn’t say the same psychologically.  
His eyes remained in the vague and he spoke very little only when it was necessary. He was always being careful when approaching him to provide necessary care. Every time he touched him, he felt tension and fear seize the boy.  
He began to remove the dressing from his neck to check the wound.  
“It’s healing well.” He said in hope it would reassure the boy but he didn’t seem to care. When he applied the disinfectant, the boy only flinched once and didn’t make any sounds like he was used to hear from most of the patients.

At his coffee break, Dr Wilson remembered what he had to face in a moment. He felt affected by the state of his patient. Before crossing the door to check on him; he prepared himself mentally to confront those feelings. But he observed with astonishment that the room was empty, no trace of the boy. He went out into the corridor and called a nurse.  
“Does the little Lupin have been taken for some test?  
“Not that I’m aware of, I’m going to check the schedule, wait a moment. 

 

“Do you really want us to get fired, because you’re doing a pretty good job at it if you want my opinion.”   
“I just told the truth.” The other policeman calmly replied. He didn’t really intend to say those words at the time, it just slipped from him and after reflection he didn’t see the wrong behind it.  
“It’s exactly what I’m saying; the truth is always the wrong choice.”  
“Not always, not more or less than lies. It’s better that way the earlier the dad realize there’s nothing to do about the culprit, earlier he will be focused on the recovery of his son.”  
“Or on what’s left of him.” A simple nod followed.

“I wasn’t aware it was so easy to disappear from a hospital especially for a child!” Lyall let his anger express accumulated since the event, now amplified by the fact that his son was missing.  
“We took all the necessary measures, all access to the hospital have been closed. We are doing now everything in our power to locate him.” The secretary replied trying to calm the man. This missing surprised her as well, she saw who the very discreet child was and it wasn’t the kind of patient that usually escaped the hospital but she kept that reflection to herself in order to not add worry on the parents.   
“We are doing to do the research ourselves, thank you.” Lyall decided taking the arm of his wife at the same time. 

It didn’t take long for Dr Wilson to find Remus. He found him on the first floor, in front of a window, seeming absorbed by the view.   
“So the cancer wasn’t enough satisfying for you anymore?”  
Wilson hadn’t seen his ex colleague behind him. His remark made him smile before answering.  
“Satisfying wouldn’t be an adjective I would use to describe cancer.”   
“Fine, so let’s say stimulating. You know what I mean.”   
“My time in oncology was limited since the beginning; I couldn’t ignore my lure for the fantastic beasts for very long.” It was true.  
“Norbert would be proud of you.” That time the doctor’s smile became wider.  
“I wish.” His admiration for the professor wasn’t a secret for anyone who knew him a little. His attention refocused on the child who hadn’t move an inch, their exchange didn’t disturb him in any way in his contemplation of something in the sky. It wasn’t difficult for the doctor to guess what he was looking at in this way. While observing the kid, he wondered how the moon now gibbous could still parade so proudly and high in the sky after what happened because of its existence.   
“A patient I presume.”  
“Yes.”  
“So I guess the creature was a werewolf.” The ex colleague deduced, coming closer to the window. He kept talking, both looking at the child now. “How is it possible to attack a child? They should be eradicated immediately.”  
Wilson couldn’t repress his reply.  
“Want to begin with this one?” he said pointing out the object of their attention.  
“Remus!” A voice interrupted their exchange. Hope came close to her son surrounding him with her arms.  
“Thank god, you’re here.” She accompanied her relief with a kiss on his forehead. She detached him as best as she could from the window. The father remained indented, something that the doctor noticed.   
“Why didn’t you bring back to his room immediately?” Anger was a logical response, he will be soon short of it, thought Wilson if he kept going like that. He hastened to reply calmly.  
“He seemed peaceful here like this; in fact, it’s the only time I see him calm since his arrival.” The sentence made Lyall even more tensed when he saw what his son was looking at. He didn’t dare to imagine for how long.   
The child was accompanied in his room by his two parents, Lyall keeping his distance. It was useless to try to talk to him; he was unresponsive like in a trance but very calm indeed. Lyall decided to sit outside of the room, waiting for his wife. She took a place next to him.  
“I don’t know if he heard but I’ve read to him.” Lyall nodded before speaking.  
“I can’t bear to lose him; it’s as if he’s not the same.” Hope didn’t reply, just nodded trying to find a way to make the situation better with what she had at disposition right now: words but nothing came to her at this instant.   
“I will find him.” Lyall declared to his wife with a determined tone.


	6. Chapter 6

Once he recovered from the full moon, Fenrir spotted the hospital Remus was in. The parents were always there. He tried to find a moment where he could go safely but started to lose hope. He just wanted to see him. The visit will be quick enough to not be risky at all.  
He came to the hospital at daytime, making sure to not cross the parents of the boy. He made his way through the hospital without raising any suspicions and crossed the door of the room he was looking for. The sight made him shiver. This asleep boy looked nothing like the boy he embraced a few days ago. His peace of mind visible in the features of his face had disappeared to give way to anxiety. He seemed so tormented and sad. How a fool he had been to think he could continue to see him after that. He didn’t even deserve to lay his eyes on him anymore, not that he did before. He had ruined his life. Fenrir couldn’t bear it and just after some seconds left the room shoving a doctor on his way. Wanting to apologize, he stopped walking and turned around. In an instant, he found himself clad on the wall with a hand on his neck.

“I will find him”.  
The words pronounced by her husband stayed in the memory of Hope. As she was walking trough the corridor in the direction of the room of her son, joining her husband, because she stopped to bring something from the car. She wondered if maybe Lyall wasn’t referring to Remus at all.   
As she walked down trough the corridor, she opened her eyes wide seeing her husband placing a man on the wall. “Lyall!” She exclaimed alarmed to stop what was going on under her eyes.  
Her husband wasn’t listening at all, his entire focus on the man just a few centimeters away from him. The man was trembling under him now which made Lyall finally speak.  
“Good, it’s you who trembles now, how does it feel tell me, it’s harder when it’s not a child against you right, bastard.”  
“I… Listen, I didn’t want, I didn’t really want to do it… I…” Lyall unable to stand listening to this anymore interrupted him.  
“Oh you didn’t want to. You see, on the contrary I pretty want to do what I’m about to do right now.” As he finished his sentence, Remus’ father released the neck before giving a punch in the werewolf’s jaw that put him on the ground.   
“Lyall stop that, right now!’ His wife was screaming not wanting the things to escalate even more.  
Fenrir was wiping the blood flowing from his nose looking around him for an escape. Lyall trying to calm down also looked around him, and found someone from the hospital.  
“You! Call the police immediately, there’s a werewolf in your hospital.” The witness took out a mobile phone.  
But Fenrir didn’t hesitate to escape; he got up and at the same time Lyall prevented him from getting away by kicking him to stay on the ground but Fenrir with his last strength repulsed him successfully to the disarray of Lyall watching him running away with terror. He followed him at a run but the werewolf without surprise was way faster than him. They shoved several members of the hospital in their race. Lyall ended up losing track of him at the ground floor and found himself at the entrance to the hospital not knowing the direction he took. With a sigh he turned around facing his wife.  
“What was that?” She asked her mascara flowing with the rain or her tears.  
“A missed opportunity to give what someone deserves.”  
Yes, Hope’s husband’s words weren’t about Remus at all.  
Their way back to the hospital was silent. The want to say something didn’t leave Hope but she didn’t dare in fear to envenom the situation, already bad enough. When they arrived at the level of Remus’ hospital room, his doctor came to meet them. He immediately invited them to follow him to go to their son.  
“It’s good you’re here well back here I mean, he’s panicking, heard what happened. We were trying to calm him but in vain, I guess you as the parents will be able to.” But to the surprise of the doctor, the parents seemed more lost about what to do, even more than him. The father watched his wife sitting to the bed next to his son trying to calm him.  
“I saw him! He’s coming back… he’s going to bite me again, he’s going to bite you daddy! He’s going to bite me again… he’s…” Before he was able to finish, his mother put her hand on his mouth making him stop screaming, but it only agitated him more.  
“I can administer him a sedative, but I need your explicit authorisation.” The doctor offered.  
Lyall looked at him at this remark, and just nodded not consulting Hope. Once the substance had been administrated, it was the father that stayed in the room sitting on the bed watching his son now calm. The doctor who did not leave the room allowed himself to say something.  
“I know what happened, I mean I’ve not seen but I’ve heard.” Lyall nodded expecting to be reprimanded again but the answer did not fail to surprise him.  
“I would have done exactly the same.”

After staying some time near Remus, Lyall couldn’t stand it anymore as sad as it is and returned to his wife in the corridor. As she saw him she informed him of the people she was seeing coming.  
“The police are coming.” Lyall checking where she was looking recognized the two familiar faces.   
“Right on time.” He snored ironically. “The real reprimand is coming now.”  
The first arrived spoke the first.  
“We know what happened. It cannot happen again. You need to let us do our work.” Hope was happy to nod hoping it would give coming sense back to her husband.  
“Not happy than I almost succeed to catch him when you let him go once again?”  
The other immediately came to the rescue of his colleague.  
“That’s not the question. You have to do with the situation and make the best of it that is to say doing everything in your power to help your son and support him at every moment and not playing the judge.” Before Lyall could reply, he added a last sentence that hit the mark.  
“Tell me if what you have done earlier brought some good? Did it help your child? I know he screamed again whereas it had been several days that he was calm. Did it even help you?”  
Lyall stayed silent.

 

On their return to the police station, one of the policemen couldn’t help asking what he had in mind since the conversation with the dad.  
“Are you okay with it?” He asked bluntly.  
“What? Okay with what?” The other replied, eyes turning to him. The time seemed to lengthen since they were on this case. Usually victims didn’t imply themselves so much. They were content to remain victims and it was better that way.  
“The situation, the fact that this child is now cursed and will suffer all his life while his aggressor is free in the wild, doing what he likes, he’s even free to do it again to someone else.” The thought alone made the other wince.  
“You know, when I was a kid I dreamt to be on the force to catch them not to let them spin between fingers.” After a silence, he said. “But you’re right he will probably do it again without a doubt. Once one like that taste the human flesh, he can’t go on without it for so long.”  
“Yes and he will disappear again, we have no way to find him now.” The other stated sadly.  
“We don’t have to do it anything.”   
“You mean waiting? That’s it?” The first that started this conversation asked hopefully.  
The other nodded.  
“Nothing let more traces behind it than blood.”

 

Each time that something that traumatic happened, especially to a child, a visit to the psywizard was compulsory before leaving the hospital. That was the procedure and the psywizard in question was very used to it and accustomed to deceive the family with her answers. She always served her speech to them the same way.  
“Physical wounds are not what must worry you. The worst ones are those who are not visible to the naked eye.” The father was the first to react at that.  
“Will we be accompanied in the gait, advised about what the best to do in our case?” She could sense the hope and need in the question but had to decline it.  
“No I’m sorry but I can tell you that people in similar situations to yours have been able to adapt very quickly so I’m convinced you will be able to do the same.”  
“The contrary would have stunned me, after the police you are not better.” Lyall exclaimed before leaving, sick of the system.

 

After having shake Lyall off, Fenrir wandered into the city before deciding to return home but passing by the bar where he has been some days earlier, he decided to make a stop for a welcomed drink.  
In this place, the physically wounded men were legion but it did not prevent one of the client that he had met before to notice his state and immediately comment it.  
“Let me guess, the father?”   
“Exactly.” As Fenrir replied laconically, another man sitting next to them spoke.  
“I never understood why you persist to visit your victim after it has been done; it’s totally nonsense in my eyes.” One word of his tirade made Fenrir wonder.  
“He’s not my victim.” The sentence made the others laugh quietly.  
“And how would you call him if it’s not your victim.” One of them asked as the laughter vanished in the room curious about the reply or more accurately about the expanse of the delusion of the man before them.  
“Remus, his name is Remus. He could have come home and live with me because of his state now.” This explanation made the laughter start again even louder.  
It was too much for Fenrir that didn’t understand the hilarity of the situation and didn’t even take the trouble to excuse him before going to the bathroom to fresh up to find a capacity. This time as he looked up after putting some water on his face, he wasn’t surprised to see a wolf in the reflexion.  
When he left the room, one werewolf handed him a photo of a child. Before his visible incomprehension, the man explained.  
“A new target, now that you proved yourself, we thought about soliciting you, I mean you just did your first and it was very well done.”  
Fenrir didn’t know what reply to give but the wolf had his idea.

 

That was it, the words that Remus was hoping to hear were finally coming from his parents, he was going to leave the hospital and today was the big day. After all the paperwork done, Remus could finally feel the fresh air on his face and see the sun without the fence of windows but more important even, the moon that required a lot of his attention and thoughts recently. When he crossed the threshold of the door’s house after only a few days at the hospital but that seemed so much longer to him, his parents exclaimed together.  
“Welcome home!”  
Remus holding his books and stuffed animals in his arms smiled to them, eager to come back to his normal life.


End file.
